A few weeks ago.I was on a plane. I was coming back from a work trip. The flight into Chicago was particularly turbulent. No drinks were served. The seatbelt light never did go off. And for someone who doesn't get sick on planes...I was glad I didn't eat dinner before I got on the flight.
The woman sitting next to me, who I didn't know but who had attended the same conference I had, was becoming increasingly more uneasy as the flight went on. She read her book more slowly, until she couldn't read it at all. Then she started making sound effects..."oh dear," "oh no," "wow." I finally took the cue and commented on her remarks. "Bumpy flight isn't it?" "Oh yes," she said. "Doesn't it make you nervous?" she asked. "Not nervous. Just acutely aware that I'm flying in the sky."
Flying in the sky! That's a thing we can do. Sometimes it blows my mind. So...if the air is bumpy...at least I'm still flying. I looked over at my coworkers. One was sound asleep, the other, wide awake. "Quite the flight," I remarked to my coworker across the aisle. "Is it making you nervous?" "Will it matter?" she responded.
Then we proceeded to discuss about this concept of "will it matter?" Our jobs are stressful. Attending this conference made us even more aware of how not being at work, but learning about how other people do your job makes you aware of all you have to do when you return to work. Mid-level management is a mostly thankless job. You're frequently caught in the middle. Dealing with the problems. Supporting the bottomline. Ensuring safety and patient satisfaction, as well as engaging the employee and making sure their needs are met as well. As we segued into a discussion of "will it matter?" she shared about how she strives to think of this any time situations at work arise. "Will it matter?" she asks herself? Will it matter tomorrow? In an hour? Next week? or Next year?
Most of the time the answer is no. But that doesn't mean I don't engage it in my worry. I'm a master worrier. I blame my mother who got it from her mother who more than likely, got it from her mother. I don't like to engage in the worry but often times it engages me whether I intend it to or not. And so, I'm trying to ask myself, "Will it matter?" And if the answer is no...intentionally choose not to worry about it.
Easier said than done, but it is a start.
*I was just back in her office and I had the quote wrong...it's "would it help?" close enough.