one of my favorite hymms is abide with me 'tis eventide. as a missionary in the missionary training center, my district (or group of missionaries with whom i learned how to be a missionary with) sang this song on our last sunday before departing to our respective missions (some went to canada halifax, some to adelaide australia). and i've loved it a little more since then.
i love the word abide. the dictionary says that it means to accept or act in accordance with but another definition means to continue without fading or being lost.
mortality is all about continuing, enduring. there are lots of ways we can continue, but to continue without fading...how beautiful is that? we are all in a wilderness of sorts, going through trials and having experiences in profound trust. to continue without fading we must have a deep trust, a trust that is deeper than the unknowns of today and tomorrow, the heartache and heartbreak of days to come and the yearnings of an honest soul. we must place an abiding trust in our lord and saviour jesus christ.
as i look at my life sometimes i get easily overwhelmed by all the things i can't see, all the things i wish i could see and all the pieces of life that i'm not sure how they will play together. and yet i feel peace.
that is one of the things that i love the most about the gospel and why i believe and have come to know of its truthfulness. i am a peace seeker. nothing can be a substitute for true abiding peace. peace brings happiness. and that happiness brings hope. these provide a foundation to continue on down the path without being lost and to continue on without failing. to abide with him and in him forever.
A few Sundays ago, I had the opportunity to teach sunday school. Part of the plan was to discuss how Joseph Smith was prepared to receive and translate the gold plates to what we now know and read as The Book of Mormon: Another Testament of Jesus Christ. The week prior we had also discussed how Joseph was prepared in his youth to be the Prophet of the Restoration.
I have a testimony of the fact that God has a history of preparing prophets in their youth to be great leaders. I think that Heavenly Father prepares all each of us in our youth for the things that will come in our lives; I only wonder how many there are that don't heed that call or respond to that preparation. Needless to say, this got me to thinking of other preparations.
For example, how was Emma Smith prepared to be the wife of a Prophet? I'm sure she was; although I just don't know that much about her life to be honest. To endure every measure of pain and heartache she endured, she was surely fit for the task although at times I'm sure she didn't think so. Certainly, my heart aches every time I think of the worry, stress, heartache and heartbreak she endured and did so with faith.
Where am I going with this? Well I just wonder if we see or try to see how God prepares us for things in our lives? Do we recognize that we have been prepared when call/s come? When trials come? When the unexpected happens? Can we look back on our lives and find something and say, I'm so grateful for that experience, or that experience really taught me this principle that I really need right now.
The life course looks different for each one of us but one thing is sure, God, our loving Heavenly Father has a plan for all his children. You and I included. So then certainly he must prepare us for what he knows lies in our path. The trick is recognizing those experience, recognizing those attributes we've had the opportunity to develop, and those gifts and knowledge with which you have been blessed with to help you along the way.
How much can one heart take? I certainly don't know. But I know He will be there to lighten any load that is placed upon us. He's told us that.
As a friend of mine once told me in a time personal crisis, isn't it a blessing that Heavenly Father has told us that he won't give us more than we can handle? I had never thought of it like that before. But there was such clarity in that statement. God won't give us anything more than we can handle. He knows that and he could have just assumed that we should know that too by virtue of us being his children whom he loves. But no, he told us he shared with us and he has illustrated in the scriptures time and time again how he lives up to this principle.
During a Sunday School discussion of 2 Nephi 31-33, the same word kept coming to mind.
Integrate.
As a "Graduate Student SLP" I have spent a bit of time working on thought integration with patients. Particularly those with right CVAs (or cerebral vascular accidents, otherwise known as a stroke). These discussions are usually quite challenging because thought integration is something typically severely impacted in a right CVA injury. Essentially, it is what it sounds like, integrating all the pieces of the information to complete a thought, idea or concept of a particular subject.
For example: if you saw a picture of a woman, a table set for 2, pots and pans on the stove and a clock that read 6:00, you could reasonably conclude (often without really even thinking about it) that this is a picture of a woman likely waiting for another person to arrive so they could eat dinner together. They're having something hot for dinner because the food is on the stove. Additionally, you could probably also assume that she was waiting for her husband to get home from work to share the meal she has prepared.
Easy enough for you and I, but for others this can and is extremely challenging.
Integration. We do so much of it automatically. But what about the times when we don't integrate what we see and know with our actions and our attitudes.
I think Nephi's final message and plea is for us, the readers of his words, to integrate the teachings of the doctrine of Christ into our lives in so much that it changes the way we act, the things we do, and the way we view ourselves and our relationship with our Savior Jesus Christ.
To integrate, we have to read beyond merely what is written on a page. We must ponder. We must apply. We must assimilate what is being said to us--our day, our life, and our individual situation. Hence, the quote above, "pondering often precedes contentment."
When we have taken the time to ponder a concept and integrate it--apply it to us to the point that it could be reality--then we can be more easily be content with our current situation and remain hopeful about the good things we know are to come. Knowing, understanding, and integrating the doctrine of Christ as found in 2 Nephi 31-33 can help make this a reality for us.
***Post inspired by the talk: Content with the Things Allotted Unto Us by Elder Neal A. Maxwell, Member of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, given April 2000.
What a day. Sometimes I get overwhelmed by how hard some peoples lives are. It's the nature of my job to see lots of people in lots of circumstances in life. Most of the time they've gone through something traumatic. A stroke, an accident, the list goes on and on. For some, life will never be the same. We talk about things in terms of "the new normal" i.e. what they and their families will need to adjust to as being the new way it is. Coping with "new normals" is not an easy task.
I'm still working on not bringing work home. Right now, I can't help it. My heart aches for these people, their families, the lives changed and affected by usually a split second occurrence.
Over the weekend, I ran across this magnificent magnet at Deseret Book. "Remember who you are, otherwise they'll take you to the hospital and check for brain injuries." I took an instant liking to it because I work with people with brain injuries. The words served a more important purpose in standing as a reminder of the bigger picture...who we really are.
Really, we're all spiritual beings having an earthly experience, not to be confused with the other way around. This means that we are spiritual beings, or children of God first, and everything else second. This eternal identity viewed from an eternal perspective helps to keep the trials of life constrained to their proper place... stepping stones to further growth and attainment (a little paraphrasing from this talk by Elder Scott).
This perspective thing is truly easier said than done. While I'd like to think that I maintain this mindset all the time...I don't. There are days and times when it seems that the here and now consumes me. Yesterday was one of those days. But I need those times too. I need the opportunity to learn again and remember again the things I know deep down. Each time I like to think that my testimony of the need for a Savior and his continuous Atonement grows just a little. Each time I am reminded how grateful I am for the possibility for change. For the knowledge of the resurrection. For the blessings of tomorrows which bring new outlooks on life--full of hope and possibility, growth and progression--however much or however little it may be. I delight in remembering the whole picture, the whole purpose, the whole meaning, the whole possibility, and the whole plan.
I brought the new year in with a bang. Literally. It is indeed me in that large coat and horrendous hat. But its an uzi in my hand--so that overrides and makes the entire picture amazing!
2011 is over and 2012 is here.
All 2011 I thought--this is the year of death. In retrospect, it was a year of comfort. For the most part at least. I spent the year doing 3 semesters of school, working in a safe clinic with supervisors watching most every move. I had colleagues who were also students who experienced this same steep learning curve. We did it together. We became family. 2012 leads me out into the big bold world. Oh the places I can go. First I venture into an externship next week. That means me, in a hospital with people who have conditions, diseases, disorders that I've never seen or heard of before and who are all over the board in regards to life circumstances, possibility for recovery, familial support, etc. Indeed, this is the year I step right on out of my comfort zone and take a swim (so to speak).
But it's a brand new year and that alone excites me. Stepping out of my comfort zone, as much as my stomach hates it, is exciting and keeps me progressing. There are lots of things I want to do this year, lots of accomplishments that will happen (graduation--hello?!?), and I'm sure a fair share of trials. But I'm in. I'm all in.
Here's to learning new things, making new friends, becoming a little more kind, more quick to observe and more diligent in doing the things I know I should. Here's to more service toward others, new opportunities and new experiences. Here's to keeping my family and friends near and dear but expanding the circle to develop new and quality relationships with others. Here's to laughing and loving more. Here's to running and hiking more. Here's to a year to remember.
Life has a fantastic way of opening doors. Today I feel one was opened. Nothing really spectacular happened, its a culmination of a million tiny little things lately. My 'purpose' is being refined and in a way redefined by life's experiences in such a way that all of my life has prepared me for this moment. God has a way of pulling things like that off. What a blessing he can see the bigger picture and that He can let us have glimpses.
The saying I'm living by today, one of my personal commandments I suppose you could call them is, "Don't be distracted." I think I could have recognized the guiding hand of my Heavenly Father more clearly a while ago, but I got distracted. And so, I've put limits on somethings (the internet, the news, 'fluffy books') that are 'distractions' and have put 'must-do' stamps on things that keep me from being distracted--prayer, scripture study, pondering, meditation, journal writing (this one is KEY for me!) etc.
Simple lessons I've learned about a thousand times now but He is patient and I am a work in progress.
Wow, last week was a little too out of control and this week is looking to be about the same way. Like Lindsay has said on multiple occasions this week--"People keep telling me, 'Don't work to hard.' I just tell them, 'Don't worry, I can't work hard enough." And so it seems to be going right now! No matter how hard I work, it seems there is always more to be done. In fact, this week I have never been so tempted break some of my 'non-negotiables.' Things that in my book, for my own reasons just aren't things that even have room for negotiation...I just don't do them or I can't not do them. One key example being: doing homework on Sunday. A long time ago I decided that it was keeping my mind from being where it needed to be on the Sabbath day. So, I decided I wasn't going to do homework on Sunday any more. Surely sacrifices are required most weekends but the Lord has proven to me over and over, more times than I can count that obedience to this law--brings blessings ten fold. And so, even though part of me wants to be very stressed this Sunday because Saturday didn't have enough hours in it to get everything done (I know right?), I know it will all work out. It always has in the past so why would that change now?
So this morning I woke up (feeling surprisingly well rested), with big plans to attend Music and the Spoken Word down at the Tabernacle at Temple Square. Both friends I had planned on going with woke up with super sore throats so for me that meant staying home or going alone. I sat on my bed in debate and then looked outside. The sunshine called my name and off I went and I'm so grateful I did. You see, I think the Lord needed to remind me of something that well...I needed to be reminded of. There is this world outside the little bubble I live in. I could hardly believe it myself. Sometimes I get so wrapped up in what I need to do, what's due next week, when my next exam is, how I'm going to target that goal in therapy, when I'm going to have time to get this or that done that I completely forget that there are 'bigger things,' other things besides me. I almost forget about the beauty of God's creations, about taking time to serve and to 'never suppress a generous thought'. I needed the wake up call to what life was really about, the call to put some perspective in my life. Perhaps this lack of perspective is what has kept this blog rather barren since the beginning of the semester--I allowed myself to get such tunnel vision that I began to loose sight of the many delights of life. Well, the spirit touched my soul in such a beautiful way today, reminding me of my Savior's love and the undeviating course available to each of us--the way to eternal life. As the choir sang songs about love in its many forms I remembered...Valentine's is tomorrow. My thoughts centered on the love of our Heavenly Father for all his children and the love I have for the people in my life. I was especially of the importance of this love as the tabernacle choir sang, "Love is a song (watch the clip above)." I heard them practice this song over the summer at a Thursday night rehearsal I attended. I needed reminder that day and I needed that same reminder today--love is a song that never ends. Bambi, the movie, has long had a special place in my heart. While it now would make me cry really hard, at one point, when I was very young, I loved this movie. In so much that I memorized the words before I could read from my parents reading it to me so many times. I would then claim to 'read' it to other people when really I was just reciting the words that I knew were on each page and turned the pages accordingly. Well today, the choir sang this song straight to my soul:
Love is a song that never ends
Life may be swift and fleeting
Hope may die yet love's beautiful music
Comes each day like the dawn
Love is a song that never ends
One simple theme repeating
Like the voice of a heavenly choir
Love's sweet music flows on
What a beautiful message for this beautiful season of Spring. As I listened to this little old man who was talking to his little old wife after the broadcast he said, "Just look at this, there is sunshine on my face and no rain falling from the sky. I can get used to this." I couldn't help but turn around and say, "me too!" Life is too beautiful, too wonderful to let it pass by almost unnoticed. Taking time to do the things that matter most, make all the difference. A lesson I've learned many times and a lesson I always seem to need to be reminded of again.
In closing, I'll leave you with this quote from a famous author (Nicholas Sparks) that Brother Newell shared during the broadcast today, I think its beautiful and the lessons we can learn from those around us who have truly learned to love not only God but their spouse, children and even themselves...well they are wonderful examples to us all.
"I am nothing special; just a common man with common thoughts, and I've led a common life. There are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten. But in one respect I have succeeded as gloriously as anyone who's ever lived: I've loved another with all my heart and soul; and to me, this has always been enough."
It is through the healing Atonement of Jesus Christ that we may have the strength to stand tall and strong and to have our souls be filled—with light, understanding, joy, and love. His invitation is extended to “all to come unto him and partake of his goodness; and he denieth none that come unto him” (2 Nephi 26:33). His promise is:
“Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.
“Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls” (Matthew 11:28–29).
Of this rest President Joseph F. Smith said:
To my mind, it means entering into the knowledge and love of God, having faith in his purpose and in his plan, to such an extent that we know we are right, and that we are not hunting for something else, we are not disturbed by every wind of doctrine, or by the cunning and craftiness of men who lie in wait to deceive. We know of the doctrine that it is of God, and we do not ask any questions of anybody about it; they are welcome to their opinions, to their ideas and to their vagaries. The man who has reached that degree of faith in God that all doubt and fear have been cast from him, he has entered into ‘God’s rest’
(Teachings of Presidents of the Church: Joseph F. Smith [1998], 56).
"Diligently doing things that matter most will lead us to the Savior of the World."
There are lots of things that pull for our attention and efforts. School, work, family, finances, health conditions, and the list goes on and on. Its not hard to fill our lives with stuff, important or otherwise. In fact, we hardly have to do anything to see our days and our time can get scheduled in and booked up.
While I could go into how this applies to MY life, I'll spare you. Let's just say I've felt really unbalanced lately. However, my delight today is centered in the peaceful reminders from a loving Heavenly Father about balance.
And balance brings peace. And peace makes Erin happy (yes, sometimes I refer to myself in third person).
This weekend I got to watch General Conference. Its a semi-annual meeting in my church when we get to hear from the Prophet of God. It was just what I needed. And just in case what I needed to hear is what you needed to hear...below I shared one of my favorite parts with you! President Uchtdorf is talking about important relationships we need to have:
"First, our relationship with God is most sacred and vital. We are His spirit children. He is our Father. He desires our happiness. As we seek Him, as we learn of His Son, Jesus Christ, as we open our hearts to the influence of the Holy Spirit, our lives become more stable and secure. We experience greater peace, joy, and fulfillment as we give our best to live according to God’s eternal plan and keep His commandments.
We improve our relationship with our Heavenly Father by learning of Him, by communing with Him, by repenting of our sins, and by actively following Jesus Christ, for “no man cometh unto the Father, but by [Christ].”10 To strengthen our relationship with God, we need some meaningful time alone with Him. Quietly focusing on daily personal prayer and scripture study, always aiming to be worthy of a current temple recommend—these will be some wise investments of our time and efforts to draw closer to our Heavenly Father. Let us heed the invitation in Psalms: “Be still, and know that I am God."
Peace comes from balance. Balance comes from being wise in how you spend your time. Spending time developing my relationship with God is a wise investment of my time, no matter how busy life is. :)
