Week 14: "As thy days may demand, so thy succor shall be."

Tonight I'm sitting on my deck watching the sun set over the Great Salt Lake. I hear so many birds happily singing with car sounds in the distance and maybe a blower? I see airplanes flying in, freeway traffic rolling along and some quail running through the backyard.  The sun will be down in 5 minutes but its about to break out from behind a cloud before hiding away behind the mountains for the night.

This week has been yet another week but its different than the ones before. In ways I cannot describe it feels as though "my chains are gone and I've been set free." This week has been a week of determination and decisions. There is something about General Conference and the opening of doors which had previously seemed closed. I'm not sure how it happens exactly but I am so grateful for the blessings of so many talks which has infinitely blessed my life. I have loved General Conference for a long time. At time I struggle when it seems my heart is reminded by each talk that I do not yet have the blessings I so desire; however, this time, the thought honestly never even crossed my mind. I felt buoyed up, assured and humbled. I so appreciated the acknowledgement by Elder Holland at the end of conference that the real world hits the day after conference has ended and we all struggle. With that in mind, I more diligently determined to fortify myself with the good word of God and a good night of sleep. I reminded myself that if tomorrow didn't go perfectly, it was okay. It was okay to not be perfect and perfectly be implementing all I had learned at conference.

"First of all, if in the days ahead you not only see limitations in those around you but also find elements in your own life that don’t yet measure up to the messages you have heard this weekend, please don’t be cast down in spirit and don’t give up. The gospel, the Church, and these wonderful semiannual gatherings are intended to give hope and inspiration. They are not intended to discourage you. Only the adversary, the enemy of us all, would try to convince us that the ideals outlined in general conference are depressing and unrealistic, that people don’t really improve, that no one really progresses. And why does Lucifer give that speech? Because he knows he can’t improve,he can’t progress, that worlds without end he will never have a bright tomorrow. He is a miserable man bound by eternal limitations, and he wants you to be miserable too. Well, don’t fall for that. With the gift of the Atonement of Jesus Christ and the strength of heaven to help us, we can improve, and the great thing about the gospel is we get credit for trying, even if we don’t always succeed."

-Elder Jeffery R. Holland

"Tomorrow the Lord Will Do Wonders Among You"

April 2016 General Conference

I realized that if I let myself only be discourage, I was playing into the adversaries trap and I was not willing to do that. I decided instead to actually listen and try to heed what Elder Holland said and trust that the Lord would give me credit for what little progress I did make, even if that was a few steps forward and a couple steps back. I decided that if the Lord was going to give me credit...why would I try to do anything any different?

I just have to share and really testify that that changed the week for me. I tried diligently to keep a reasonable amount of commitments I made including going to ward temple night (even though I'd been feeling guilty for every time I went to the temple without having done Grandma's work). I woke up early and actually got ready for work. I prayed better in the morning and I listened to a conference talk everyday. It changed my week! Instead of feeling overwhelmed and grumpy, I felt happy and that with Christ, I could do all things. I felt inspired with answers to prayers (the 3B's) and I felt the sincere love of the Lord.

I also determined that Grandma's temple work had to be done that week! And so, on Friday, I had the incredible privilege of doing her work in the Ogden temple. I wrote a post about the experience that maybe one day I'll post but until then, I'll treasure it in my heart. As I sat in the dressing room and cried at one point, my heart was so overwhelmed with the Lord our Heavenly Father has for all his children and that its never too early and its never too late. The Lord works on a different timetable and for that...I am so grateful.

The Lord is truly intent in our personal growth. He is intent on leading his children home. He is intent on families. And as our days demand, he will support us and help us along the way.